Be Here, Get There

For a practice that’s supposed to calm your emotions, the subject of meditation can stir up strong ones. While some people swear by meditation, lots of people still scoff at the idea, in part because of the woo-woo, hippy-dippy language that surrounded the practice for so long, as well as the lack of validation by Western medicine. At the same time devotees were working to broaden its appeal, these factors combined to make yoga less accessible—or acceptable—to the masses. With the benefit of a fairly large body of research, including randomized control trials, which have looked at various aspects of meditation, we can now measure many of the purported benefits of meditation on the brain and body, and researchers are also beginning to tease out how it delivers these effects. This scientific imprimatur has opened the doors of meditation to more people, providing evidence of the real and positive effects that can be had from sitting still and chilling out. In fact, from 2012-2017, the rate of meditation practice among adults in the U.S. more than tripled, to just over 14%, outpacing the growth of yoga.

Mindfulness, a similar yet distinct practice with a more secular connotation, can be done off the meditation cushion in just about any situation. According to Jon Kabat-Zinn, the creator of mindfulness-based stress reduction program (MBSR), a secular mindfulness-based program designed to treat stress, pain and other conditions, mindfulness is the act of “paying attention in a particular way, on purpose, in the present moment, and nonjudgmentally.” As with meditation, mindfulness requires us to just be, in the here and now, and also has many of the same positive effects on the mind and body as meditation.

Full disclosure, I’m a convert to meditation and mindfulness, and I use them for a number of reasons: as a way to learn more about myself and grow as a person; to calm myself down when frazzled; to deal with in-the-moment aggravations—seemingly endless in New York City; to help me stay present and focused; to tune out distractions and be more efficient; and to manage negative emotions when they pop up. I also meditate at night to help me fall asleep faster, stay asleep longer, and to improve the quality of my sleep.

Dan Harris, a well-known news anchor and convert to meditation (he’s authored two books and has a podcast on the subject), famously had a full-blown panic attack on live television. He subsequently found his way to meditation as a way to manage the anxiety and depression that had plagued him for years. You can hear him talk briefly about his experience and the benefits he’s gotten from meditation here. Harris is no Birkenstock-wearing hippie (OK, I don’t actually know his choice of footwear); rather, he’s a successful corporate, Type A guy who’s found meditation indispensable for managing anxiety, depression, and anger, which has improved his life and the quality of his relationships. Research backs him up on this, and points to a host of other benefits, including neuroplasticity, lower blood pressure, lower markers of inflammation (a contributing factor in most chronic lifestyle diseases), and more.

I recommend that my clients incorporate a meditation or mindfulness practice—or both— into their lives in a way that works for them, so they can better manage stress, anxiety, and negative emotions. A particular type of meditation, loving kindness meditation, has been shown to increase positive feelings toward oneself and others, and has helped my clients who have practiced it tamp down self-criticism and negative self-talk. Another practical benefit of meditation and mindfulness is that it helps quiet your mind long enough for you to understand your own motivations, hang-ups, and fears—so you can create lasting behavior and lifestyle change. Without this understanding, making lasting change in any area of your life can be difficult, if not impossible.

Once you understand what your motivations are, you can tap into that understanding to help you get through the inevitable stress, lack of motivation, etc., which often derail even the best attempts at making lasting change. If, for example, you realize that your desire to lose weight is not just about looking better in your clothes, but more importantly, about being healthy and strong for your children and grandchildren, and avoiding the downward spiral of chronic disease that’s plagued other family members, you’ll be much more likely to power through the tough times on your way to achieving your goals. It helps keep your eyes on the prize.

Working with a certified health and wellness coach trained in motivational interviewing can help you figure out the prize you actually wish to seek, and the motivations behind seeking it. Your coach can then help you formulate a practical plan to incorporate mindfulness, SMART goal setting, and other tools to make lasting change, providing the unbiased support and accountability you need. Meditation, mindfulness, and coaching can help you both be here and get there.